Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Earth Day

As you may or may not know, I'm basically a vegetarian except when in comes to Earth's most delicious resource: chicken drumsticks. Everything I do lessens my impact on the Earth, in fact by staying relatively immobile for long periods of time, I use less oxygen, produce less carbon dioxide, and consume less energy. In order to save our beloved Earth, I long ago made the decision that my only mode of transportation would be bicycle or canoe. In fact, I got to my study site in Paraguay, where as you may or may not know I study Helmeted Woodpeckers in the tropical rainforests, after two months of constant pedaling and paddling. So I suppose you're basically thinking, where do chicken drumsticks fit in to this awesome committment to the Earth's resources? Well, what I didn't mention is that I only eat drumsticks from organically raised and genetically engineered 6-legged chickens. Basically, this means that it takes 3-times fewer chickens to satiate my appetite for chicken flesh. It's hard maintaining my overwhelming committment to the Earth, but basically, you're welcome.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Your commitment to saving Earth's resources is astounding... I wish all people could harbor such determination and put forth so much effort to support such a noble cause... Blog on WGB, Blog on...

Anonymous said...

I would like to commend you, WGB, for being such a righteous SOB. As far as eating chickens is concerned, you may find comfort in the fact that chickens are close kin to vegetables, basically. You may or may not have known that but given your vast (virtually unequalled) intellect, I would presume that you did know the aforementioned tidbit of trivia.

World's Greatest Biologist said...

Right on studs, right on.